In other words, even if I didn’t have an ostomy I would still have Crohn’s and would still have a chronic illness.
If dating and falling in love were like it is in the movies, all we would need would be a good-looking person, a well-written script, and a perfectly chosen song.
I have debated for a while about writing a post on sex.
I know my parents and my parents-in-law and even my grandparents read my blog (I’m giving you fair warning that this is one post you can skip!
I was sitting at the dining room table, across from a home health nurse, and my parents were talking in the kitchen down the hall.
The dating scene can be stressful and often causes the fear of rejection (and that’s without an ostomy) so entering the scene after having surgery can feel a bit intimidating.When I first had my surgery, I made the mistake of telling people on the first date. My eight surgeries and my ostomy consumed my life in the beginning and that’s all I had to talk about. Figuring out how to explain it is probably harder than finding the right time to tell someone.I took time off work to physically heal and put school on hold. Unfortunately, but not surprising, I didn’t hear from any of those men again. Most people I dated had no idea what Crohn’s disease or Ulcerative Colitis was let alone an ostomy. I usually started with “Have you heard of Crohn’s disease or Ulcerative Colitis? I’d get the occasional “yes” and that would make it somewhat easier. Needless to say, very few of the men I dated asked any questions after I told them and many of them, I saw maybe once or twice and then for some reason stopped talking to me.Finding a way to tell that person for the first time is my biggest challenge.I’ve realized over the years that there isn’t a specific time when you tell someone, it’s whenever feels right. I waited until the person got to know me better and it felt that it was leading to something more.